Unfortunately, many people think of “couples counseling” as characteristic of a bad relationship—or worse—a precursor to divorce.
The truth is that relationships are just plain hard. Sometimes, we need help navigating marriage, strengthening the relationship, and ultimately becoming better partners. Seeking professional help in this hope is not a sign of failure, but rather a sign of strength.
How Do You Know When It’s Time?
Beyond times of extreme crisis, when the choice to seek help might be more obvious, couples may decide to enter counseling if:
Fights Are Unproductive
It’s normal and even healthy to fight; however, some couples experience fights that are repetitive, constantly unresolved, defensive, and/or exhausting. Do you feel much worse after a big argument? Do you feel distant? Do you feel closer to your partner after a fight but somehow unsettled and mistrustful? Couples counseling can help you practice healthier fighting.
They Are Experiencing a Major Life Change
Moving, unemployment, parenthood, loss of a loved one—therapy can help a couple get on the same page during the beginning of change and learn how to support one another through challenging times.
They Have Grown Apart
Life is busy. These are distracting times. Parenthood, while emotionally fulfilling in its own right, can minimize the amount of emotional energy we have available for our romantic relationship. Many relationships ebb and flow as passion waxes and wanes. This is normal. However, if the distance between partners seems insurmountable or the ebb phase seems longer than is comfortable, counseling might be a good idea—not because the relationship is doomed, but because sometimes the path back to the bedroom (or even back to cuddling on the couch) can seem unclear.
Because They Want to Be Better!
Believe it or not, some couples enter counseling for no reason other than a shared goal of improvement. Preventative medicine, if you will, allows you to get it right from the start and appreciate the love that is very much present in the relationship.
Seeking support for your relationship isn’t a last resort—it’s an investment in your future together. Learn more about relationship wellness at PHAwellness.com.